Heart Cries

As bad as I hurt why is it so hard to let go? What am I so afraid of?

Self doubt, self hate, is leading to my self destruction. How did I allow myself to get this tangled up in confusion, lies, lust, and hate?

At what point did I stop being me?

Allowing a man to define who I am. Allowing a man to treat me less than a queen. Settling for less than what I deserve. Compromising my innocence because in my mind he will change. Breaking my promises to God for mere words from a man.

I think I am more angry with myself than him because I compromised. I allowed this. I didn't protect my heart.

I made him my god! Idolizing him!

This isn't His best for me.

Lord please tell me you are listening to my Heart Cries!